My First Blog: Just a little to start with~

Sooooooooooo I just got here... it's pretty empty...and I don't even feel like I am a good enough writer for blogs. I'm here b/c Michelle brought me here. But I think that maybe I could share some of my thoughts and pictures with my friends and family. So we'll see...

Right now I'm at a part of my life where there is a lot of change. I just finished school and will finally have some sort of degree. I'm really considering pursuing my field of Criminal Justice which is exciting. Jermaine doesn't want me to be a correctional officer....but that's because he doesn't want me getting hurt. I'd be in a very stressful and possibly dangerous environment daily.....mandated to stay for shifts....etc.

I feel empty though, I'm not sure why... maybe b/c I know deep down inside this graduation was supposed to be spent with my best friend Michelle. She's here alive and well, but she took a break from school and I kinda get sad when I think about it... But she's fine. That's just me being selfish. My mom and Dad are not going to be able to be at my graduation. When I found out I cried like a creep in the bathroom at work.... (confession). The second I told my fabulous friends, they rallied behind me and said they'd be there. I am very grateful. My sister and brothers will also be there and thank GOD my hubby (well not yet but almost lol) and my two daughter's will be there as well.

I'll be thirty in a few weeks. That sounds so old to me....omg. I remember being three. I remember being 8 and helping my mom with my little sister as a baby and now I have two of my own and grey hair (blinking). This is the age where I really have to be a "grownup". I have to let go of unnecessary people, thoughts, and negativity. They say when you reach this age, you have almost no friends lol. It's true I guess. I have 5 really close friends and even that's a lot. I'll take that!

I'm slowly making changes with my inner self. Trying to be a positive person even when things are the pits and trying to encourage those around me to be positive. I think when I get encouraging words, it really helps me to feel better. I'm just trying to use that same energy on others around me. I'm happy though. I have my days where everything seems wrong but that's because I'm human. We all are. I'm thankful for those days when I'm not happy b/c they remind me how wonderful happiness is! I'm not perfect. Sometimes I'm not very nice but I think that could be a reflection of how I feel I'm being treated at the time.... idk. I'm sure everyone can relate to that. I'm honest though. Too honest lol.

I'm all over the place but I really excited for summer to start. I just want to hit the beach and pull out the grill... the grill Jermaine ad I don't have yet. LOL Oh my goodness, I prolly should introduce my family members to you readers! How rude of me.

I have a wonderful boyfriend Named Jermaine. He is totally a great guy, a little rough around the edges but once he gets to know you, he's a softy. He's a great dad and step dad to my two children. I have a seven year old named Brooklynn and she is apparently the spitting image of me.... has my attitude (dear God). I also have a 2 year old named Charlize. Charlize is totally opposite of Brooklynn. She's not as social with strangers and she is a big ball of fire. She acts more like Jermaine. He's completely out numbered in our house and complains about it a lot. He grew up with no brothers and four sisters. Poor guy. Secretly though he is obsessed with us I'm sure. LOL Any who, these are the people who keep me alive and breathing everyday. Hopefully I come back and post and you guys aren't utterly bored with my life. =)